Azekeil (azekeil) wrote,

  • Mood:

Confusion and hopefully catharcism

Earlier today I had an argument with kissycat1000 about learning. I later spoke to stuartl about it as well. I'm not looking for who was right or wrong, or even seeing what can be done to help ourselves. Now I am merely trying to understand why it is the way it is.

I feel confused and upset. I can't begin to make sense of it all, I don't think I want to try any more. I think I want to give in to feelings and emotions and gut instinct and just ask for some give, some fallability. Not because they're wrong, no, mostly because they're just right. I want to have a valid opinion, I want to be accepted, I want to feel like I have input, I want to contribute.

At the moment I just feel like I hold back, I hinder. It isn't doing my self-confidence any good - I have this horrid feeling I should break down my character, analyse it and rebuild it. I feel like my fundamentals have been attacked, although that's daft.

I think I just feel uncentered.

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