Azekeil (azekeil) wrote,

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A time for reflection

I have been meaning to write this for some time. I have been off from work since the beginning of the month, and I won't start work again until I start my new job at Messagelabs on the 26th. During this time off I have relaxed, done really not a lot, got on with personal projects, let my place go a bit, played computer games, bought stuff I've been thinking about buying for ages and not felt guilty about any of it. It's been a really rejuvenating time.

Physically I still feel really quite run down, but this last week should hopefully sort that out.

But it got me thinking. You know sometimes when you just want to scream "Stop the world, I want to get off!" - well, I'm living that now, sans guilt. It's a wonderful relaxing feeling. I know I always feel very drained when I'm working - both mentally and physically. This manifests in not really being my whole self. I can't admit to having been 'my whole self' during this time off though, as instead of work I have the recovery from my tonsillectomy to cope with.

I find that the mere act of going to work and working within parameters set out by my job leads to me feeling distinctly uncreative in any artistic area (not that I was hugely creative to begin with). During this time off (and prompted by a documentary about a modern day iron age settlement and that interesting historical science series) I realised that I could start my 'middle age crisis' early, as the metal-working equipment I need (at least to start with) is not at all prohibitive or hi-tech. This makes me very happy as it gives me something to aim for once the house is somewhat done, and will be a wonderful (and physical) creative outlet for me :)

Having a house with a garden makes it possible to keep and use some of this sort of equipment here :)
Tags: introspection, update

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